Why You Need To Check-In On Friends
How to talk to your friends and loved ones about mental and emotional well-being.
Words by Damian Nicholas
DEBORAH FEINGOLD/WARNER BROS./COURTESY-EVERETT COLLECTION
In today's digitally focused and often stressful world, it's easy to get caught up in our own lives and forget to check in on our friends and family. However, now more than ever, it's crucial to prioritize our loved one's mental and emotional well-being. The simple act of calling someone can make a significant difference in someone's life. One of my favorite sitcoms growing up was "Living Single", a classic sitcom that beautifully showcases the power of friendship among a group of dynamic and diverse characters. The show does an excellent job of highlighting the importance of supporting one another through life's challenges, including mental health issues.
Whether it's Khadijah, Synclaire, Regine, Max, or Kyle, the characters lean on each other during tough times, openly discussing their feelings and offering unwavering support. Through their bond, "Living Single" not only entertains but also emphasizes the significance of addressing mental health and seeking help within a supportive community. “Living Single” provided a way for me to address mental, and financial issues, with friends during my early teenage years, offering support or help when requested. To date “Living Single” is one of my favorite shows to binge and is a sitcom worth introducing to the younger generation.
Recently, I came across an article about a concept called Just Checking In from Mental Health America (MHA), the concept is a set of ten simple questions designed to help you connect with your friends and family on a deeper level. These questions are not only a way to start a conversation about mental health but also a tool to show that you care and are there to support them. Narrowing down those ten questions to six questions we feel are vital questions or conversation talking points to help you connect with your friends and family.
1. How are you feeling today, really? Physically and mentally.
“How are you feeling today, really? Physically and mentally” this sets the tone for an open and honest conversation. By asking this, you are letting your loved one know that you genuinely care about their well-being and are ready to listen without judgment.
2. What's taking up most of your headspace right now?
“What's taking up most of your head spaces right now?” allows them to share their thoughts and concerns, allowing them to express themselves and feel heard. If possible, encourage your loved ones to express themselves while doing a social activity. I would recommend connecting a social activity with a simple exercise, for example, grabbing coffee from your local coffee shop and heading to your nearest park – this allows you and your love ones to openly discuss any issues over coffee while you walk around, your love ones physically well-being is just as important as their mental well-being, which we will discuss more in question 5.
3. What was your last full meal, and have you been drinking enough water?
Questions like "What was your last full meal, and have you been drinking enough water?" show that you are concerned about their physical health as well. However, depending on the individual you may want to rephrase this question, based on your situation, as this question maybe seen as a bit to aggressive – especially if you ask this question randomly without context.
4. How have you been sleeping?
Sleep is essential for good mental health, so inquiring about their sleep patterns with "How have you been sleeping?" can lead to discussions about any potential issues and ways to improve their sleep quality.
5. What have you been doing for exercise?
Encouraging physical activity is vital, as we’ve mentioned in question 3, so asking "What have you been doing for exercise?" can motivate them to prioritize their physical well-being.
6. What did you do today that made you feel good?
The questions also focus on positivity, asking about things that make them feel good, something good they can do for themselves, and what they are looking forward to. This helps shift the conversation towards a more uplifting and hopeful tone.
It's important to remember that you don't have to be an expert to check in with someone. The key is to listen actively, stay engaged, and offer support without judgment. Checking in doesn't have to be a grand gesture; a simple phone call, a text, or a video chat can make a world of difference to someone who may be struggling mentally. So, why is it essential to check in with friends and family? Because it shows that you care, it opens the door for meaningful conversations, and it provides much-needed support to those who may be going through a tough time.
Expressing gratitude is a powerful way to promote positive thinking – in addition to the definition of empathy, this is a phrase I would often mention to my 10-year-old son, before I drop him off at school every morning. I hope the things we teach our children can prepare them to effectively deal with life's challenges ahead.
Damian Nicholas covers cannabis, lifestyle, automotive and design in New York. More about Damian Nicholas
Oct 16, 2024More in Journal
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